wachaujoyce1998

There are days I leave work tired and all I want is to catch a sunset. So, I go to the rooftop of the building where I live and stare into the horizon, my bag still on my right shoulder, and take some photos of the sunset. To my far right, I can see the Ngong windmills, between them and me, lots and lots of houses. To my right, is a skyscraper of garbage, a mountain so high that it is almost the same height as some nearby buildings. It has become the unwanted neighbor who brought nothing but decay, flies and fetid smells.

The smell hits you first within a kilometer radius before you even set eyes on it. The horrid stench hangs on to the air like its life depends on it. At times, early in the morning when you board a bus, you are met with the rancid smell and your nose contorts into shapes you never knew it could and at other times, you can taste the smell on your tongue. I dread when it rains because when it does, drains are blocked and all that flows is streams of sewage and filth! That is the Kawangware dumpsite in Msalaba for you! An unsightly tower of garbage getting higher by the day. The pilling up is getting out of hand and the street boys collecting garbage have erected wood fences to prevent the mountain from toppling over.

It has been quite a number of years since I moved to the neighborhood and I have only seen garbage collection trucks twice. Back then, it was not as bad as it is. It has grown into a monster. Stories of it are spoken in hushed tones. Questions as to who is benefitting from having the dumpsite there are still unanswered. Someone is definitely making money off it because there is no way one would be aggressive when the locals demonstrate and raise concerns about the health and environmental hazards.

The garbage mountain has since displaced the shops that were close to it. The few times it has been emptied, by the following day, more heaps of garbage are dumped. Street boys collect garbage from apartments in wooden handcarts, one at the front and another at the back, for easier movement. The road at this exact position has been halfway blocked. A bump of garbage has formed and you can see buses dangerously maneuvering, since every driver, motorbike rider and pedestrian is in a fight with whoever is strong enough to pass first.

We say one man’s trash is another man’s treasure, but the rot has ripened and taken root in that very same ground. Or maybe that particular piece of small land was cursed that its belly would always be full with no rest, or that it would be damned to an eternity of being dumped on. Maybe it already gave up on ever finding redemption. The land probably thinks tomorrow died yesterday, like ‎Chimeka Garricks says in his book. There’s no hope of ever seeing the sun, feeling its rays penetrate the ground, feeling the rain pour on it. It has forgotten what human footsteps on it feel and sound like, forgotten what the smell of clean air is.

There are days when the sun shines hot but the earth doesn’t feel anything, it’s too hot from the piling garbage that keep its floors well covered and smelly, and whenever the wind blows cold, it doesn’t feel it because it has a huge blanket of assorted trash surrounding it, acting like a shield in battle. It breaks my heart to see children playing around the dump, emaciated stray dogs lying there scavenging and people still selling products around there.

Proper waste management remains to be a far-off dream. The dumpsite is in an illegal place, and should have been closed down way back, due to the hazardous implications it has brought with it. Despite the promises from the Office of The Governor, no action has been put into emptying the dumpsite. It has been a show for the cameras and once the cameras are put away, we go back to the same distress, the same worry, the same deplorable conditions, the same traffic, and the same insecurities. The promises are no different from the pungent smell hanging around. They reek of betrayal, and sadly we’ve been left to collect the ashes of the lies flung at us.

I started crying in the washroom just before I left work. I could feel my cry caught up in my throat and I just couldn’t shed the tears no matter how much I tried. Soon as I walked out of the gate, it all came crashing down on me and I cried all the way to the bus station.

I feel so bad, I feel so down, I feel like life is being really unfair to me. I feel like I am experiencing one problem after another. I want to get a job that I love, a job that appreciates me, a job that I will be happy at. I feel drained and by the day, my spark and life draining out of me.

I hate when I have to break down in public because my employer was being shitty and mean towards me for no reason whatsoever. I hate that I have been here close to 5 years and I have nothing to show for it. No promotion, still earning peanuts despite the fact that I have tried to argue my case every year. I thought being the best employee all year should be a reason to be treated with respect, a promotion, a raise perhaps? But no!

I know I’m crushing out but I can not help it. I feel so bad and I can’t stop crying. All that is running in my mind is how I want to wake up one day and decide that I will be quitting on that day and never look back. I can’t help but imagine a new life in a better workplace environment with every application I send out. I daydream about what healthy work environments look like because my current is the exact opposite. I am telling people every day to recommend me to their jobs incase they have openings. I am good at what I do and I know that all too well.

I honestly hope there’s something positive waiting around the corner, even the smallest one. That is all I need to not completely lose it. To give me hope that the bad days do pass too.

My wrist watch died at 5:15 am. I say this because I took it from the usual spot on the table and fixed it around my hand but I didn’t check the time. While in the bus, the traffic too much to bear, I looked at my hand to gauge how late I would be. The hands weren’t moving. Stuck at 5:15 am. I tried tapping on the crystal Incase something in there had gotten jammed.

Then I told myself, it’s been a year plus I’ve had the watch maybe the battery had just died.
‎She is white in color, with a golden lag, silver crown and a silver buckle, such a beauty!

‎I got to work and decided to try resuscitate it. I held it in my left hand and tried playing around with crown and voila! It came back to life.

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Normally, once I leave work and I am back at my place on Friday evenings, I don’t leave the house until Monday morning when I’m leaving for work.

But today I had to step out. I had to go get my phone’s charging system replaced because it hasn’t been working since Friday. I didn’t know how long it would take so I took my new Nora Roberts novel.

I sat at the phone repair shop, next to the busy road, music blasting from the shop, people, cars, motorcycles, chicken and stray dogs passing by and read a few pages as I waited for the phone to be fixed. The two guys I found there were nice and I always appreciate providers of services and sellers who are kind and considerate as they attend to you.

I get the ick whenever I come across a huge billboard designed with AI. I sneer at them and the company behind the Ad because couldn’t you have done better?

AI is here to stay and it’s good that we have found a way for it to complement our day to day activities. My problem is, as a seller selling a product or a service, I would be more inclined to purchase what you are advertising if I can feel some kind of human resonance. I want to feel that human connection when I look at your billboard.

I have a huge problem with crossing roads! I fear crossing roads 😔😂 and it’s way worse especially here in Kenya where people don’t observe traffic laws and what not.

So today I’m grateful because one woman driving her car actually stopped and signalled me to cross and I made the thank you sign 🙏to show I’m grateful to her for that kind gesture. Were it a public bus or any public vehicle, they definitely wouldn’t have let me cross.

So yes! I am grateful for this gesture today.

Good morning and a blessed day to each and every one of you.