Depression (short for Major Depressive Disorder) affects about 14.8 million adults in the US, it strikes women more than men, and the median age of onset is 32. Put that together with the insulting ads that suggest we should give our loved one a new car — or maybe we should give each other new cars – and you’ll see at least part of the cause.
By the age of 32 a person will have seen zillions of ads in print and television, on billboards, and on items of clothing – their own and unknown passersby: ads all designed to make the viewer feel inadequate. Why else would you need the product, if not to bring you up to some illusive standard of fashion, sexiness, or up-to-dateness?
So you try this product, that job, and the next love partner.
By the age of 32 I imagine that people will have experienced the thrill of being hired for what looked like a great job and dating a person who appeared to be the person of their dreams – perhaps neither measured up. Maybe they have had children who turned out not to be a constant fountain of love, but smell bad, scream, and need attention from their exhausted parent. Ditto the spouse.
So by 32 you’ve seen all the products guaranteed to make you all you want to be – rich, good-looking, upwardly mobile and so on – and you may have slammed your head into the wall of reality. Jobs often suck, you’re not making enough money, maybe sex isn’t always thrilling, babies don’t seem to complete your life in a deeply meaningful way, and a new car siphons large payments out of your bank account every month.
Ironically, if someone DOES win the jackpot, it appears that the rich, sexy, and successful are often as unsatisfied as the rest of us, but with more money to get depressed with.
So we’ve lost our optimism but the ads keep coming. How could we not be depressed? We will never be a Victoria’s Secret model or even look good in their underwear. We will never be on American Idol, never win the lottery, and never really feel good enough unless we can throw off the phony commercially promoted expectations and embrace ourselves as we are: perfectly imperfect.
My husband responded this way when I told him I was blogging about the cause of depression: maybe we’re depressed because we see that the world is going into the crapper.
So, plenty of reason to become depressed and plenty of prescriptions that may help you while making mega-profits for the drug companies. For me, happiness and satisfaction has come from de-coupling from the consumer society as much as possible, getting out of debt, letting go of destructive work environments, and putting my two cents in about making things better. I wish you well this holiday season in finding something truly joyous in your life, rather than the Lexus, Rolex, or gaudy jewelry being promoted on TV. Happy Holidays!