Counting Stars…

One Day I Will

May 8, 2011 at 7:45 pm (Lists, Needs)

• Find a unique name for every color in my bedroom.
• Write lines of lyrics on a hundred pink post-its, and stick them on the front doors of those I miss.
• Admit that the only thing making me a bearable poet/writer is my vivid imagination and my powerful imagery.
• Sing in an empty theater with only the raindrops to accompany me.
• Hold you close to me and bury my face on your shoulder, and feel your heart beating in my chest.
• Stare at the sun.
• Paint a self-portrait and use the red of a cherry for the shade of my lips.
• Drive fast after a heavy rain and not stop until I find where the rainbow ends.
• Find someone who won’t laugh at me when I tell them fear makes me laugh, music makes me cry, and Claire Dane’s crying makes me want to shoot someone.
• Clarify my position and remind some people they’re too pitiful for me to waste such a powerful emotion as hatred on them.
• Eat fried chicken in Kentucky, bed a Bill in Buffalo, enjoy a torpedo in Nevada, and walk around in my Ruby Slippers in Kansas.
• Print 1000 fliers with messages of love and hope, and distribute them in downtown Athens, urging people to pass them on to someone in need.
• Make you cum with just my eyes.
• Sleep with my teddy bear again… which incidentally is a duck!
• Play dress-up like I’m 8 again, wearing a sheet, my mom’s pearls and a paper tiara, and trot around to the sound of Jean Michel Jarre’s Equinoxe.
• Learn a really exotic foreign language, one that is almost wiped out. It will be like preserving a dying piece of the world.
• Set the bunny free in the wilderness to explore nature, and wait to see if it will come back to me.
• Fly away, leave all this to yesterday.
• Play Bach’s Prelude in C major on an abandoned piano, where dust and memories will dance around in the rhythm of my breath.
• Stand on a balcony in the mountains, wrapped in an orange blanket, and watch the smoke of my cigarette as it flirts with the predawn fog.
• Dance around like nobody’s watching, even though I secretly want them to.
• Convince myself I’m worth all this, and more.
• See your reflection behind me on the bathroom mirror, feel your fingers on my back and your kisses in my neck, turn around and you will be there.
• Take off in the middle of the night for an unknown mountain destination, relying only on the kindness of strangers for food and shelter.
• Ask for forgiveness. And grant it.