Rantings of an over-worked, sarcastic Pakistani chick

I really do! I can never think what mine should be. And somebody should make keyboards light up when needed; would make typing in the dark that much more convenient, and if somebody already has please tell me.

Right now I’m indulging in my favorite winter past time, sitting out in the balcony in the dead of night. And since ours is more of a tiny, tiny strip of outside space, I’m simultaneously thanking God for our wonderful maid who mops it so that I can sit out on the floor when ever I want, as there is no space for chairs and even if there was I wouldn’t be dragging one out anyway. Seriously, too much work!!

Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about this whole blogging thing. It isn’t as if I’ve lost all reason/ desire to write, which is really all I really want to do here. I think I’ve grown past writting for comments, not to say I dont like them but I’d really just like to write for myself, more a catalogue of all the craziness and less a cry for attention. But catalogues require honesty, more blunt and rude then polite and considerate in my experience and a whole lot of whining about unnecessary and inconsequential things in hindsight which really weren’t so when they were being written about. In either case, the blog is too very public to allow me that freedom. Saying I don’t care about the consequences would be idiotic because I do. I’m about to start this whole new life, one in which I would have to be that much more grown up and mature, even if i’m pretending most of the time. I don’t want to whine about anything and everything only to have it quoted back to me.  I’m not saying that it will happen but I feel as if there is a good chance of that. We’re all human at the end of the day. Plus I never really liked the whole ‘bitching about every person I ever came across’ deal, even if that is what I feel like doing, it doesn’t accomplish anything, except allowing you to vent. So then what do i do, do i throw caution to the winds and just let it all out, unleash the bridezilla that’s been lurking somewhere under the surface these days or not write about any of that stuff which basically means I’m out of writing material i.e. good bye dear blog or do I write about other stuff?

Maybe i need a project, if I do decide to write about the other stuff, but doesn’tt life always interfere and make its presence known? To think this was all brought forward becasue of a movie. I just finished seeing Julie and Julia and seriously if you like the idea of food, watch it. Made me yearn for my school kitchen. That place has ruined me for life, I can’t do with amatuerish cooking equipment anymore and as far as I can tell I will never be able to have the things I had there. But then I do have a Kenwood Chef, so maybe I’m wrong! It would be beyond hilarious if Gul Plaza and Bohri bazaar turn out to the haven this poor, wanna be chef desires. Sort of like the poor woman’s Jashanmal, my visit to which made me want to max out my father’s credit card.  Or maybe I’ll buy all my stuff the old fashioned way; save up, take a deep breath and shell out for the Le Creuset pans, one by one. Maybe I will have a Peugeot pepper mill one day, a beautiful, shiny, red one. Till then I guess I’ll have to do with what I have. And even if I do get all of that stuff, who will eat what I cook with it? There may be things which I’ll eventually be able to convince A to do, eating salad greens tossed in olive oil, salt and pepper and topped with this awesome black pepper crusted, seared tuna steak is most definitely not one of them. Why have I become so very gora in my food choices?

So coming back to the point, should I risk all and write, should I quit while I’m ahead or should I attempt writing a diary, which is something I am positive I’m not capable of doing since hitting publish makes me habby 🙂

Bah!