Mangina Monologues

What to do with a three day weekend. Hmmm.

Well, I haven’t been home for a weekend since about December 14- and the first two weekends in December were full of holiday concerts, so they don’t count as “free” weekends. So really I haven’t had a free weekend at home dating back to the end of October.

Yikes!

No wonder my life was so Koyaanisqatsi. Jesus.

So I made a deliberate choice to stay home for this weekend and let mom’s care facility do their thing and keep her cared for. I’ll go down this coming weekend to check in on her. But I really needed this space.

I filled my time with cleaning and organization. I cleaned out my fridge- getting rid of all the old jars and tubes of stuff, wiping it out, etc.

I also pitched some old clothes: like old underwear, holey socks, stained t-shirts, etc. Then I started collecting a “donations” bag for goodwill. At some point I’ll go through my closet and wean myself of shirts I never wear.

Next, I went to the dreaded Target and got 4 more organizer bins. These were filled with my wool sweaters (with lavender scent mothballs) and wool blankets and such. This cleaned out a drawer in my armoire, so I was able to put all my shorts into one drawer instead of tossing on a shelf.

I also cleaned out the top portion of the armoire so it now stores my bags and jewelry and such. (I also dusted and cleaned off the top). The remaining shelf items (a couple sweaters and sweat clothes) I folded and neatly stacked. Then I organized my shoes in the storage unit according to use.

My closet actually looks presentable now!

I did some shuffling of my main closet too- but damn. It just needs work. Meaning I need to get off my ass and just purge crap. Crap that I’ve accumulated for far too long. Part of me doesn’t want to let go, but the other part of me is like “I’ll never miss it”.

I think I might post some stuff on FB Marketplace before I fully delete the platform. I might make a quick buck (like getting rid of an Atari and transformers and Disney VHS tapes, etc). I just don’t have the energy or gumption to sell them on eBay.

(Oops- forgot to post this Tuesday)

With windchill it’s like in the 40 below range.

Meanwhile…

Palm Springs will be a perfect 73° today. Basically about 85 degrees warmer than where I am currently. (Our high temp today is a predicted -12).

This is when I hate Minnesota the most.

Ok- so my handy neighbor Jason was able to get my second new door installed in my Palm Springs place. And I gotta say- I’m super excited!

The first door installed was the front door. It has a mid-century vibe to it with the long, reed glass light. In case you missed other posts, this is it:

In addition the awning was raised in order to let in more light. BTW? Those windows face the mountains to the south and west.

But the door I’m most excited about is the one leading from the living room out into the lanai area. It was basically a solid door before. But now?

I’m so excited to get back and see it in person! I know it’s going to brighten the space dramatically and it freshens up the architecture. (The old door was just a generic outside door with a small wagon wheel top window. Ugh. So awful.

And the blinds will add privacy when I need it. Which will be almost never. I like light.

And here’s the longer term vision… maybe. I’m still working out color scheme and what to do with porch. AI can sometimes be useful (just imagine the trailer hitch white – and sign post maybe turquoise or orange)

Mom hasn’t been “right” for weeks now. Foggier than normal. Saying weird shit. All signs of another UTI.

Ever since her hospital stint in November for her UTI that went septic, I’ve been hyper vigilant. And I’ve also been voicing my concerns to her care facility.

And rightly so as mom has gone through two additional courses of antibiotics. The most recent was after new years when they discovered she had another infection.

The thing is, I don’t think the course of antibiotics is clearing the infection and she’s getting worse. Or it’s just still hanging in there. Perhaps it never fully cleared from the hospital visit one. I don’t know.

But mom has still been loopy and conversations with her have been difficult. Her facility is doing additional labs and I think she’s still on a course of antibiotics currently, but I should know more today.

What makes me feel guilty is that I’m not going down to visit this weekend. I haven’t had a weekend at home since early December and I’m burned out. I need time to sleep in and clean my place and run errands and just do my own crap. Plus it’s a 3-day weekend and I really really want that extra day.

But naturally the whole time I’m thinking “I should drive down and check in with mom” even though there’s nothing I can do really.

Ugh. I hate this.

Last week I received a cAll from the social services director at my mom’s care facility. The “Medicare paid for” portion of her skilled care was to on Friday, and the therapists and others did not feel mom was able to go back to her old room where only occasional assistance was needed.

The short version: she would need to remain downstairs in the “additional assistance” area.

The longer version? A lot of decisions had to be made in a very short time.

I could hold onto her upstairs room in the hopes that she could eventually gain enough strength to return. But that would mean paying for two rooms— which is financially impossible.

I could temporarily hold the upstairs room, until decisions could be made one way or the other. But pay for both spaces, of course.

I could relinquish her upstairs room and keep her in the additional care area where she’s currently sharing a room. But this would mean clearing all the stuff out of the upstairs room as soon as possible.

I can put her in a waiting list for a single occupancy room so if one comes available she can have more privacy.

The facility can continue to review her abilities with the potential of possibly moving back upstairs to be more independent. (But let’s be honest- she has Parkinson’s and she doesn’t take care of herself so her condition is only going to deteriorate).

So this past weekend, I drove the FJ down to Iowa and single-handedly moved some things downstairs to where she currently is- and the rest into the storage facility that I acquired over a year ago when I was cleaning out mom’s house prior to selling it.

Given mom’s current state, I know she needs to be in the “more care” area. She likes the staff well enough but wants a single room- which will take time. And she understands that.

I’m just bummed that she isn’t going to get the intensive PT anymore which was at least forcing her to exercise. I’m also a bit shocked at the increased cost. Granted we’re paying for the additional assistance, but the room is half as big and it’s $3500 more per month.

Financially we can absorb this hit— mainly because she still has a good chunk of Long Term care insurance left. But that will only cover about 70% of the room— her pension and social security can luckily cover the rest (with a little left over).

Still- it’s all stress and I hate that mom is shrinking and shrinking into a smaller footprint.

I learned awhile ago that my love language to others is Acts of Service. Especially when I was taking care of dad toward the end, or with things I do for mom to make her life easier.

It’s the yardwork and painting and installing things for life improvement, fixing stuff, or organizing, or cleaning, helping out, running errands, etc. I don’t enjoy doing these things necessarily, but I do them – ostensibly to show love.

I’m not good with physical touch or words of affirmation. Gifts are a crapshoot at best and I take ZERO pleasure in trying to figure out what to buy someone. And quality time? Maaaaybe?

Side note: I still don’t know what love language I like to receive. Mostly because I’ve never been in a position to receive it. But I think it’s words of affirmation.

Anyway. For Christmas, because cookie baking was always what mom did- but she can’t now- I’ve assumed the role of cookie provider. Now, mom did have a huge recipe box which went to one of my cousins. And I had to request pictures of one of the recipes. For the other cookies I was gifted a 1960’s Betty Crocker Cookie cookbook.

This year I made four types: date cookies, cutouts, peanut butter, and spritz. The date cookies necessitated the recipe card request.

Mom specifically requested the date cookies and spritz this year. And since she’s had a rough go lately… that’s what I did. I’ve never made either.

Well- that’s not true. I tried spritz once under mom’s tutelage… and it was mostly a disaster. They can be tricky to get to stick to a cookie sheet.

But this time? I borrowed a spritz press from a coworker and BAM! It worked so well!

This fucker was a miracle machine. I churned them out like it was nothing and had almost no issues making them. The cookies came out decently uniform and shaped well. And they taste just as I remember.

Huzzah!

My cutout cookies? Decent. They’re a bit overdone- but they taste good. The secret to mom’s is mixing vanilla and almond extract in the batter.

The date cookies were a surprise. Never made them. They aren’t hard- just different. They incorporate sour cream. And dates. And chopped nuts. (I subbed in pecans instead of walnuts, because I’m pretty sure that’s what mom always did). And brown butter icing.

While I never tried one of mom’s, I tried one of mine. Surprisingly ok tasting. Now, if I wanted to change them up a bit so I would like them more, I’d make them fig and macadamia nut. Or pistachio. Or hazelnut.

The peanut butter cookies? Meh. They’re fine. I couldn’t find the damn chocolate stars, so I just mixed in chocolate chips. Whatever. Easy peasy.

So- holiday baking is done. But now I need to start planning meal prep for Xmas with mom (I will be pre cooking a meal then transporting it down). And I also somehow need to find a time to shop for some stocking stuffers.

And find the stockings- which may be in mom’s storage unit. 😬

I think it’s time I cut the Facebook cord.

For a long time now (really since Fuckerberg caved to the alt Right) Facebook has become an increasingly disgusting cesspool of negativity and bot activity. And very suspect with regard to censorship – or lack thereof anymore.

Facebook was also just a bunch of targeted advertising too. So many ads!

I guess it all came to a head for me after the murder of Renee Nicole Good this past week.

Her murder was captured at multiple angles on various videos. I think it pretty clearly shows that the ICE fucker was not in immediate danger, he was able to step to the side of the vehicle, and he illegally used excessive force to murder an American citizen.

Then the administration jumped to defend him. All the way to the vice president offering total immunity.

Then the Facebook comments started. My feed was full of news stories leaning right – even though I am very left leaning. And the comments were all “she brought it in herself” or “she should have obeyed” or worse “she was a domestic terrorist and deserved it”.

While I’m sure most of these comments are Russian bot generated in order to sow divisiveness, it was just more than I could stomach. I was getting sucked into the negativity and becoming more and more agitated.

I realized then, that FB was just an unhealthy space for me.

And while it was hard to delete the app, because it meant cutting off contact with some friends, it was time. And really, how much positive contact was I getting?

I’ve kept messenger, at least for now. And I still have an instagram account , which I’ll have to start learning how to use better. (I’m not convinced that I like Instagram either, but…). And while I have a Bluesky- I never use it.

Maybe I’m not a social media guy- and that is ok.

I’m hoping my mental health starts improving, the more distance I gain from the fuckerberg filth.

CV is short for Coachella Valley. And the CV Link is a big ol’ bike trail that links Palm Springs to other Coachella valley communities- like all the way to Indio, I believe.

While not fully complete yet, it has a great start- especially in the PS/Cat City area:

I wasn’t sure about it and had limited info. But, as it turns out, one of my park neighbors is like majorly involved in lots of stuff in the park and the city. He’s like a Palm Springs welcome wagon! His name is Scott.

Scott organizes group activities in the park, and walking/hiking groups. And he is also a biker. So he offered to take me on a ride to show me how to “link up” with the CV Link.

The. Thing. Is. Awesome.

It’s away from most traffic. It’s cement. It’s wide and flat. It’s smooth as glass and clean. It’s color coded. It has small “rest areas” and occasional drinking fountains. It has solar lighting.

I’m telling you- it’s nicer than any bike trail in the twin cities. For this inaugural ride, I was taking it easy (especially since I was riding with another person). But alone? Imma be able to fly on this shit!

The only thing that is a negative is that flat tires tend to be a thing here. Evidently there are these very sharp, pricker thorn things from the desert plants which can wreak havoc on bike tires.

My thick slicks did ok on the first ride, but I’m definitely going to have to scout out “rescue means” if I end up out on a ride and get a flat. Like- where are the nearest bike shops? And where is a bus route to get me home if needed?

Other than that? I’m completely jazzed to explore this when I’m out there again.

2025 was quite the year.

I’m not talking geopolitically- although it was. This is more of a personal review.

I always make New Year’s resolutions and post them on my fridge. There are personal health goals. Financial goals. Social goals. Artistic/development goals. You get the gist.

Most years I’m mildly successful. This year tho? I did pretty well overall and feel fairly accomplished.

Big things that happened in 2025:

• Got mom’s house fixed up and sold
• Bought my vintage trailer in Palm Springs
• Completed various personal home repairs/improvements
• BMW Repair achieved (mostly under warranty)
• Trombone repaired (finally)
• Got serious about my weight loss and hit 205 before the end of the year (still at least 15 to go)
• Successfully maintained my emergency savings even with my purchase
• Reduced needless expenditures and online subscriptions to save money
• Got mom’s finances better invested (from house sale)
• Started a novel (currently at ~50k words)
• Maintained my musical interests while reducing some time commitment (for sanity)
• Achieved work goals to maximize bonus potential (all signs point to it being a healthy one!)

I’m sure there were some smaller things along the way. I did have in my list to take a good vacation- and I took several to PS. So that kind of counts.

Areas where I didn’t do well:

• Purging my storage area and crap from my closets in Minneapolis.
• Selling/donating spare instruments
• Hosting more parties (I hosted book club a couple times), but that’s it)
• Writing music

Definitely room for improvement- and some of these things got added to the rezzie list for this year. I am going to make a concerted effort to purge early this year. And possibly redistribute some things to Palm Springs that I don’t use here.

It’s only the 6th of January, but I’m feeling optimistic.

I decided this year I would make use of my pied-a-terre in PS to ring in the new year. And I’m glad I did. I had a lovely vacation there. Mostly.

It was just the to and from that sucked. (And some of the weather).

So- I flew out on December 30th. The plane was 3 hours late taking off. Weather delays throughout the US sort of ruined things- and then maintenance. And de-icing. But I got there.

I was just bummed I missed the fun Tuesday group that does Songo at the bar; I arrived far too late.

And then there was the 2 days of rain. Steady, decently heavy rain for all New Year’s Eve and Ne Year’s Day. (Which highlighted a roof leak, which is now hopefully fixed). 😬

Yeah- with the rain, I happened to notice some drips on the floor in my second bedroom. And a slightly bowed space in ceiling. Yup- leak. Thankfully my neighbor Jason helped me scout the roof, and fix two cracks which be believe to be the culprit. We’re going to continue to monitor. The good news is that heavy rain isn’t typical there.

I had Jason (handy neighbor) install a new front door- and help to lift the awning on the front of my place. The aesthetic is so much improved!

The new door with the glass already improves the interior of my place by allowing more light in. It’s very noticeable. As is the additional light from the lifted awning!

Other than the house projects and general cleaning, etc, I drank and ate way too much. But I had tremendous fun and met some nice, new people. I hope to become friends with these folks longer term.

Oh! I almost forgot. Once the weather broke, I went for a short bike ride to a hiking trail. (Yes- I finally got my bike assembled).

I also got to do an exploratory bike ride with my neighbor Scott. He showed me the CV Link (Coachella Valley) bike trail. Omg, you guys! It’s flat and smooth as glass and goes all over the valley. It’s fucking brilliant. More on that in another post.

But alas. All good things come to an end, and I flew home last night. After a 4+ hour delay. Got home at 4am, and I am beat.