hello. welcome. 

my name is maia and in my second tongue that means something that doesn’t exist, a blur. i’m simply not there, nor anywhere. i exist only in the mind. and perhaps, hearts. universally unidentifiable, i’m not real in entirety. i could be anything, or nothing.

i am fluid, everflowing as a river. think Heraclitus.

it is, i am fully aware, quite offensive to exist this way. it disturbs a well-established order, The Order of Things, the structure of knowing.

however, writing (and by association, reading) is, according to Donald Bartheleme, “a process dealing with not knowing, a forcing of that what and how”. that being said, then, it just makes sense when the “what and how” in my little realm of a tiny universe is hanging mid-air. foggy. misty. and then there goes: a tear of/in not knowing

in life in general, not knowing is the lush, fertile soil that breeds fear and assumptions that have the tendency to lean more onto suspicions of taking, intruding, manipulating—an invasion of being. but if we let our hearts lead with compassion, kindness, fondness towards life: not knowing can, instead and in an instance, grow into The Peaceful Nothingness. but only if you let it. let the universe gives what it has to give, you are not undeserving, you are a blessing. even in a state of (not) knowing.

to feel safe in (not) knowing this way, you need, first and foremost, to feel safe within yourself, within your body, your mind, with who you are. to trust in you that you know what you know about what you know, ergo about (not) knowing what is presented to you. and perhaps none of it has nothing to do with what we’re going to do. yet it has everything to do with what we are going to perceive in the nick of time you are here.

let us let go. let us, for a minute or two (or three), let go of The Order of Things, the structure of knowing. let go of the world that we know to a realm of not knowing. let’s think for a second: it doesn’t matter who, what we are. it doesn’t matter who, what you are. we’re here to feel. be. 

unclenched your fists. deep breaths. you’re doing amazing xx