A Foster Mom's Journey

We are doing respite care for another baby boy this week. He's 7-1/2 months old and already weighs 26 pounds. He is the happiest baby, and so easy to take care of. He's really only fussed a couple of times since he was dropped off last night, and he slept like a champ his first night here. Down for bed at 9:30 (late, because he didn't get dropped off until 7:30 pm) and stayed asleep until 5 am. He took a bottle,and went back to sleep until 9:3 am. Amazing!

He'll be with us until August 15. It should be a fun week, but very busy. My three kids are in their second week of daily swim lessons this week, and we start at 9:30 am, so it'll be very busy in the mornings trying to get everyone ready and out the door. This little guy is on a nebulizer twice a day, plus some other meds, so trying to learn all of that and blend it into our existing schedule will be a little bit of a challenge, but so far so good!

Baby boy has gone home with his mama and they will both now be living with mama's aunt. I think it was a good choice. Mama was only 17, very soon to be 18, and aunt was willing to take both of them into her home. It's in a completely different city, all the way across the state, so hopefully that will give mama a new start on life. And hopefully aunt will help teach her to parent well. He left our home on July 1, so he was only with us for a week, but we enjoyed having him in our home.

We got a call this last Friday to take another baby, but we had already left for a camping trip and where we were we had no cell service. I didn't get the message until this afternoon, so I'm not sure if they found a spot for the baby yet. All I could get from the message was that they needed a temporary home for baby while they transitioned he/she back to mom. So I'm not even sure if we'll get placement of this one - I'll let you know!

We have a new baby in the house! Yesterday around dinner time we took placement of a 3-month old baby boy. I found out today that it looks like he'll be placed with an aunt on Tuesday afternoon, after a court hearing. So we won't have him for very long. I don't know what is more of a challenge - taking care of an infant again, or keeping my own kids out of his little chubby face! They just want to surround him constantly, and I think he gets a tad overwhelmed! He slept ok last night - down to sleep around 9 pm, up at 1:30 and 5 am for feedings, and up for the day at 8 am. This afternoon has been a struggle for him - I think he's realizing this is not home, and has been very fussy. But he's good right now - he's cooing to my daughter while he is in his swing. Hopefully those coos won't turn in to screams!

It has been a long time since I updated this blog - wow! Life does get busy!

We are still licensed foster parents, but we now mainly do respite care and emergency placements. We took quite a break in 2009 - too many things going on in our lives, and a big surgery in October for me - but since the start of 2010 we've gotten back into fostering. We've done three respite cares - a 10 month old boy, a 4 month old boy, and a 3 year old - and we've done one after hours emergency placement for a 12 month old girl. We had to turn down a second after hours placement due to other family commitments, but we are back on the list again. It's a good fit for our family now - our kids (all three adopted in 2008 from foster care) know that we are just "babysitting" and that the kiddos we take in aren't staying forever. We had thought, or at least, I had thought, that I wanted one more child to adopt, another girl. But after doing the respite care for the 4 month old, I realized that adoption of more is not on the books right now for us. We are so set in our schedules now, that having a new baby on a permanent basis would not be a good fit. So, we continue to do what we feel called to do right now - helping other foster families and taking in the late night, after hours emergency kiddos. I am really beginning to see the difference in what I want versus what God wants. He really does speak to your heart if you just listen! I'm a poor listener sometimes! I always want to thrust my own ideas and opinions out there, and hope that God makes them happen. But when I just wait patiently on Him, and listen to what He wants me to do, things work out perfectly! At this point I know that unless God really puts a new baby in my lap and speaks loudly to me for adoption, we are done. But it's a good feeling, not a bad one!

It goes the same for home schooling. I guess people just automatically assume that if you are a foster parent, or an adoptive parent, that you want to, or have a great desire to, homeschool. That has never been the case with me. But I felt so pressured by others at times, thinking that was what I was "supposed to to". I feel that if God really wanted me to homeschool, it would be on my heart, or that He would need to really shout it out to me. I think that our public schools need Christian families involved in them. My husband and I both attended public schools, and I think we turned out just fine! I want my kids to be an example to others about God's love and I want them involved in public school. And to be even more honest - they need a break from home just as much as mommy needs a break. I want them to learn that mommy and daddy aren't the only people in life you need to listen to and obey.

Saying all that, our oldest starts kindergarten in the fall. He is so excited about it! He tells everyone that he gets to go to "the big school" after summer is over. And my youngest one starts preschool this fall, 3 days a week with our middle child. So, for three mornings a week, all three of my young chicks will be at school, and mommy will be home for 2-1/2 hours by herself! What a concept! I'm not sure what I'll do at first, but I know it will be a good time to get caught up on things at the house. School is only 5 minutes from our house, so it will be easy to come home right after drop-off. All three of our kids love school, and look forward to going. I hope it will be that way forever!

PS - I will be back-updating some posts, just to get current on some things. I hate things being out of order, so as I post about old news, I will back date it. Hope it doesn't confuse anyone!

Today is the last day of school - it's hard to believe that another school year has zoomed by. Here is what the kids look like today:
And here is what they looked like on the First day of school in September:
Not a huge change, but a change nonetheless.

This is what we made for the four teachers that the kids had in preschool this year:
And this is what we did to celebrate! We went to our favorite family friendly pizza place (no, not CEC) and met some friends there for pizza and ball pit play. It was a great way to end the school year!

Each year, the state Children's Administration department combines efforts with other area agencies to put on a Foster Parent Appreciation Dinner for all foster parents in our region. It's really a wonderful event - a nice sit down dinner, lots of fun italian sodas, tons and tons of great door prizes and awards for foster parents. Our Foster Parent Association also gives out two awards each year at this dinner - one to celebrate a community member that has helped out the fostering community, and one to a social worker who we feel as gone above and beyond the call of their job. As the new President of the Foster Parent Association, I was given the honor of handing out the Social Worker of the Year award. We decided to give it to our Respite Coordinator, who had done an awesome job making sure that foster parents are getting what they need for respite care. She is so committed to the children in care and their foster parents. She has worked for the department for going on 20 years, and she was absolutely flabbergasted to receive the award. But the whole room gave her a standing ovation, and she very much deserved the honor. Although my hubby and I didn't win any door prizes, it was still a wonderful evening!

I've been a board member of our Foster Parent Association for the last few years, first serving as just a general board member, then as secretary, and then last year as Vice President/President Elect. And now, starting today, I have begun my term as President. This organization, although a good one, and one that has been around this area for 20+ years, had hit a rough spot a few years back. Over the last few years, the organization has really started to turn around, and has gotten stronger. I am really looking forward to this next year as President. I have some goals to accomplish, and I am hoping that they can be realized. I want our organization to focus on three areas - Education/Training of Foster Parents, Implementation of Services for Foster Families and Foster Children, and Social Activities for Foster Families and Foster Children. We are working hard on a few items that hit each of these goals.

First, a clothing room that can provide foster families and foster children (and adoptive families and relative placement families) with clothing and children's items (toys, books, home furnishings, etc). We are working with a local church network that is taking one of their older buildings and turning it into a community center. The exciting thing is that the center is located in the zip code of the highest amount of foster children placements. We are excited about partnering with this church group to really get into the neighborhoods of the highest needs.

Second, we are working on a mini-conference in September to help give much needed training hours to our foster parents in the areas they most need help. Our first mini conference was last fall, and it went extremely well! We had high attendance, we were able to provide child care, and the department really helped us out with it.

Third, we are working on both a summer picnic and a fall festival for our families. Both provide a great time of fun and fellowship for our foster families, all while keeping it safe for the kiddos.

This will be a great year - I am really looking forward to it!

It is amazing to me the changes in my kids over the years. Here's a little retrospective through the last three May's.

May 2008

May 2009

graphics for moms


I found some fun graphics for foster and adoptive parents. Just click on the image above and it will take you to the page. There are some really neat ones!

Hope you all have a good Mother's Day!

Hello readers! I know, it's been forever and a day since I have posted anything. I thought I better do a quick update before I post any more entries though. I have decided to make this blog a little more private, but I don't want to shut out anyone who has been a long time reader. So, in one week, I'm going to switch this blog over to invited readers only. If you have been a reader of mine, and want to stay connected, please leave me a comment with a request to be added. I will need your e-mail address, so you can probably go to my profile and e-mail me that. I may not get any responses to this - who knows! It wouldn't surprise me, since I haven't posted in ages. But if anyone is still out there, and wants to stay connected, let me know!

Hope you all had a great Easter!