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Different Day: May 2006
Different Day
Thoughts on culture past, present and future
Sunday, May 28, 2006
On this day:
Dismantling Catenaccio
My erstwhile coursemate at Nottingham Trent University, Christian O'Connell, has got the gig to present ITV's quirky, sideways, irreverant look at the World Cup hosted by a comedian. This time the show is called World Cuppa. I'm sure it will be amusing enough, but I sincerely hope that among his many guests Christian finds space for our deeply entertaining former lecturer, Con Lodziak. Some years prior to becoming an expert on critical theory and author of such tomes as 'Manipulating needs' and 'The myth of consumerism', Lodziak wrote a cash-in guide to 'Understanding soccer tactics' for the 1966 World Cup. Could you picture Jamie Redknapp being led from a discussion of the merits of a libero to a discussion of the merits of Theodor Adorno's negative dialectics? It would be a truly surreal and hilarious sight. Chris Morris would do it. Have you got the balls, Christian?
I found this fantastic picture of the German footballing legend (and maligned ex-coach of Scotland), Berti Vogts judging a beauty contest whilst searching for a suitable World Cup-themed image for a magazine cover. It's a fabulous shot: so many layers of signification. Great for a caption competition too.
While in Thailand I kept seeing a TV ad for the latest single by a pop group called Same Same. This duo, Clint and Bob Moffat from Vancouver (imagine identical twin cousins of Greg Rusedski) were, according to the Same Same website, "Members of one of the world's most successful pop/rock bands in the 90's [sic], The Moffatts." One of the world's most successful bands I have never heard of, but hey, who's splitting hairs? Same Same is a clever name, not only because the duo are identical twins. As anyone who has spent much time in Thailand, China or other parts of the Far East knows, 'same same but different' is a popular 'wrong but right' local variation on standard English that is used to describe two things that are similar or, when ordering food, to give two people the same meal on separate plates or in separate bowls as opposed to sharing one dish. ('Same same but different' t-shirts are also very popular with 'farang' (western) tourists in Bangkok - I even brought one back myself.) The Same Same single getting the heavy promotion was a tracked called 'Farang Ja', the first ever duet between a Luk Thung (Thai traditional music) singer and a farang vocalist. The Thai singer in question is Arpaporn Nakonsawan, a woman who has sold more than 32 million records. 'Farang Ja' is part of a carefully thought out marketing strategy by Same Same's label, Sony BMG. The debut album is being released in six countries, but the release has been staggered to "allow the band to travel from country to country for promotion," says the website. Thailand and The Philippines set the ball rolling, followed by Malaysia and Indonesia, with Taiwan and China finishing things off. The album includes a duet called "Without you" that has been recorded in five different versions, each with a different Sony BMG artist singing in her native tongue while Same Same sing in English (although their harmonies have been recorded in whichever local language is necessary for each of the different markets). Reminds me of when The Beatles used to sing in German before their huge success made English the de facto international language of pop. As China flexes its muscles on the world stage maybe Mandarin will take over that role in future?
Billy Mitchell's dad? No, Mitch Mitchell's brother
"Who's George Mitchell?" An innocent question and one you wouldn't expect a well-educated American would have to ask. You know, George Mitchell, the Mitchell Accord? The Good Friday Agreement?? Peace in Northern Ireland??? "I thought Bill Clinton was responsible for all that." Apparently that is the way 1998's Good Friday Agreement between Ulster's Loyalists and Republicans was presented Stateside. Now while the process certainly would never have gained any momentum without pressure from the top, it was Senator Mitchell of Maine who put in the hard yards to get a result. If Slick Willie got the glory at home, it was the glory of a star running back waltzing in for a touchdown from the one-yard line after his unsung half-back team mate has put in the hard yards. Mitchell's role in brokering the Good Friday Agreement was overlooked by the Nobel Prize Committee too, the Peace Prize in 1998 going to Northern Irish politicians David Trimble and John Hume instead. Fair Puppies, as they say in Ilkeston, but you'd think the Maine man's Wikipedia entry might big up his negotiating achievement in one of the world's sectarian trouble spots. Think again. Mitchell's role in Northern Ireland merits just five linez. A possible investigation into Barry Bonds' alleged steroid abuse that the ex-Senator may-or-may-not head up later this year is worth nine. 'The Mitchell Accord? What's that' indeed!
It was also great to catch up with another old mucker in Thailand: Alexander Reynolds. When we were at journalism college in Clerkenwell I don't think either of us ever expected we would one day be watching Hazell DVDs together in Bangkok (Which bit do you like best? 'The bit where he walks across the screen')! In between writing for the Torygraph, Alex is training for some upcoming professional Muay Thai (Thai boxing) bouts and working on a book about US jails, which, if the bits of the draft I read are anything to go by, will be extremely entertaining. Cult film fans may be interested to know that it is the same Alexander Reynolds who penned 'Carpet Garden Flowers', the darkly funny tale (based on a true story) of Notting Hill coke scum trying to bury a comatose diabetic drug dealer in their garden. In a prescient piece of casting, the ill-fated Holby City star George Calil (whose even more ill-fated girlfriend, Laura Sadler, fell to her death while high on cocaine) took a lead role in the short. The film's other lead, the fantastic Guyanese singer/actor Sol Raye, sadly passed away a couple of months ago. 'Carpet Garden Flowers' may not be his usual cup of tea, but it stands as one of Raye's many fine legacies to the world of entertainment.
It was good to catch up with my old mate Brian Boyd in Bangkok last week. Brian's latest venture is a rather nifty idea, a comic strip for English students called Grammarman (yes, he's a superhero who fights bad English!). Already syndicated to newspapers in Malaysia and Argentina as well as Thailand, Grammarman could be appearing in book form soon. Watch this space.
Pink Floyd – Cirrus Minor David Bowie – Black Country Rock Royksopp – Clean sweep Goblin – Profondo Rosso (album version) Cabaret Voltaire – Spread the virus Radio 4 - Enemies like this Twisted Sister – We’re not gonna take it Frankie Goes to Hollywood – War Working Week – Venceremos – we will win Aswad - African Children Big Audio Dynamite – V. Thirteen Bollock Brothers (feat Michael Fagin) - God save the Queen Mekons – Millionaire The Rakes (feat Lethal Bizzle) – 22 grand job Sugababes – I bet you look good on the dancefloor (Arctic Babes mix) The Streets – When you wasn’t famous Finitribe – 101 (sonic shuffle edit) The Chameleons – Second Skin (live at the Gallery club, Manchester, 1982) The Smithereens – Behind a wall of sleep (live) The Supremes – Where did our love go?
As predicted by yours truly (told you Michael!), Lordi's 'horror metal' wowed the Eurovision audience last night, 'Hard Rock Hallelujah' taking first place for Finland. The NIHM bandwagon is in full effect.
According to reports, Heinz is planning to launch a baked beans on toast snack later this year that only requires heating in a toaster. Clearly the company thinks that there are enough lazy or incompetent people in the world for whom heating up a saucepan of baked beans and toasting some bread separately is too much effort. Unfortunately they are probably right. But two wrongs don't make a right. This product should be heavily taxed and the money used to teach people basic cooking skills. The same should apply to other 'convenience' foods that are turning people into slaves of the microwave oven and the toaster.
A recent trip to India (one of the causes of my blogging hiatus for the past few weeks) made me realise why the country has the world's biggest film industry: drama is interwoven into the fabric of everyday life. Two instances from the short time I was there: firstly, K. Suryanarayana, an engineer working in Afghanistan is beheaded by the Taleban, prompting a public display of grief by his widow. Pretty normal so far. Then the local news starts showing an ambulance taking the man's other wife to hospital after she has attempted to kill herself upon learning of his bigamy! The second instance, the death of Pramod Mahajan, the General Secretary of the BJP, the country's main opposition party, as a result of wounds sustained when he was shot by his own brother. Travelling around Andhra Pradesh in the 44 Celsius (112 degrees Farenheit) heat was an incredibly dramatic experience in itself, not only because I didn't see another westerner for three days. Rural India literally teems with life - elderly villagers strolling across the road with no fear of being run over; lads on motorbikes or in tuned tuk-tuks (auto rickshaws); swerving our car to avoid bison or oxen heading straight towards us; slowing down to let a family of monkeys cross the road. Hyderabad is a really vibrant, cosmopolitan, yet thoroughly Indian city. From the sleek modernism of HITEC City (home to Microsoft, Oracle, etc) to the Shi'a muslim dominated Abids district and its beautiful medieval monument, the Charminar, "The Arc de Triomphe of India" as it is sometimes called. Alongside the drama of the place, my other abiding memories are of the politeness and knowledgeability of the people I met: from the Hyderabad bell-hop thoroughly familiar with a company I was visiting in Rajahmundry; to the Delhi businessman on the night train to Secunderabad who knew several of the managers I had just interviewed; to the excellent tour guide at the fantastic Golconda Fort who was also kind enough to buy me a bottle of water.
Good to see that Grace Jones has lost none of her star quality! Hope she finishes her long-awaited new album soon: the (pop) world needs more characters like her.
