Hot August Historic Awardees

Armor History Lesson: 16 Years Ago...

(26 August 2006) Haphazard Armor
England | Darren's death was a puzzle. The 33-year-old was found slumped in the hallway of his house, bleeding from stab wounds. Had an assailant attacked him? Police could find no supporting evidence. A year later the Inquest revealed why Darren can take his place among the stars of the Darwin Awards. Left alone in the house while his wife was on holiday, he decided to he decided to 'fork around and find out' if his new jacket was stab-proof...

Pallet History Lesson: 5 Years Ago...

(August 2017, Japan) Forklift Around And Find Out
Logistics was uppermost in the mind of a warehouse employee of Tanarumono Logistics. The worker needed to change a light bulb ten meters overhead and the forklift could only reach 2.5 meters, clearly not close enough. Expressed as a math problem: A person can reach a light fixture 2 meters overhead — and wants to replace a lightbulb 10 meters overhead — so how many 15-cm wood pallets must be stacked onto a 2.5 meter forklift platform, to reach the burnt bulb?

Title Suggestions From Readers
"The Odds Were Stacked Against Him"
"Jenga Difficultly Level: 10"
"Stack Attack!"
"An Unpalatable Death"
"Pallatative Care"
"Skidmark"

Heedless History Lesson: 25 Years Ago...

(77%) Out Of Their Minds
23 August 2007, HOLLAND || Darwin notes: "This sort of thing is rare today because changes were made to vehicles to protect the guilty, but for awhile there were quite a few incidents reported to the Darwin Awards."
HOLLAND || A group of employees was thrilled to enjoy a team-building bus tour, and get a break from BAU (Biz As Usu). It was sunny, and the more boisterous employees enjoyed sticking their heads out of the rooftop window like puppies in the wind. And then it happened — two men were singing lustily as the wind caressed their faces, when the bus entered a viaduct...
 
and the Heedless became the Headless. . .
 
which really isn't a thing, they only snapped their necks, a quick and painless death and a lesson for the rest of us.

Train History Lesson: 20 Years Ago...

(2 August 2002) Long Lonesome Train
Kansas | Driving along Interstate 35, an Olathe driver's sloppy-jalopy broke down. Attempts to repair it were futile. So the man pulled out a cellphone—the mobile's moniker in 2002—and called for a tow. As he ambled along the railroad tracks parallel to the freeway, he focused intently on the device (as one does) and was utterly oblivious to the sound of a train whistle...
 
The train engineer reported that he covered his left ear so he could better hear the conversation on his device!

Chicken History Lesson: 27 Years Ago...

(79%) Count Your Chickens
Six people drowned Monday while trying to rescue a chicken that had fallen into a well in southern Egypt. An 18 year old farmer was the first to descend into the 60-foot well. He drowned, apparently by undercurrent

Wild Animal History Lesson: 15 Years Ago...

(77%) Beer for Bears
Serbia | It's well known that alcohol impairs judgement. It's well known that carnivorous wild animals and humans don't mix. What happens when we combine all three...?

Swimming Pool History Lesson: 14 Years Ago...

(77%) One Foot In The Pool...
Indonesia | Charles had just completed his studies at King William's College, and his dreams were ambitious. He planned retire by the age of 30. Unfortunately for Charles, his expensive education omitted an important lesson from the curriculum...

Grenade History Lesson: 16 Years Ago...

(76%) Hammer of Doom
Brazil | August brings us a winner from Brazil who tried to disassemble a Rocket Propelled Grenade by driving back and forth over it with a car. This technique was ineffective...

'Chinese Fire Drill' History: 12 Years Ago...

(76%) Ride 'Em Cowgirl
In THAT much of a rush? A cautionary tale for those who can't spare the time to slow down and do things properly. Kentucky Kelita Hicks was travelling 'at highway speed' down Country Road 519 in her

'Crossing The Road' Lesson: 8 Years Ago...

(76%) Race To The Death
For most people, the danger of fast traffic is obvious; for example few would be foolish enough to attempt to cross a major Interstate with 80-mph/130-kph traffic. Rare that anyone dies walking across a busy street, but then... there is Kevin Ward.

Mini History Lessons: Rando Years Ago...

(75%) Darwin Awards Shorts
These five random snippets were collected from emails over the past decade. Their origins and veracity are unknown. A man in a diabetic shock swerved off Route 2 in Lexington, Mass

Flotation History Lesson: 16 Years Ago...

(74%) Faithful Flotation
Gabon | During an impassioned sermon, a congregation was surprised to hear their 35-year old pastor insist that one could literally walk on water, if one had enough faith...

Snake Hunting Lesson: 23 Years Ago...

(71%) Smarter Animals
An Iranian hunter was shot to death near Tehran by a snake that coiled around his shotgun as he pinned the reptile to the ground. Another hunter reported that that the victim, named Ali, tried to catch the snake alive by pressing the butt of his shotgun

DIY History Lesson: 12 Years Ago...

(70%) Do It Yourself, Do Yourself In
Ah, summer, the most blissful of seasons, when Darwin's most popular summertime activity -- do it yourself stupidity -- kicks into high gear. Meet Charles, 34, a Denver masonry contractor who works with

Greyhound Bus History: 13 Years Ago...

(70%) Missed The Bus
A 24-year-old woman was ironically successful in her attempt to catch a bus in Quebec City. Clutching a can of pop, the woman ran into a restricted area...

Roller Coaster History: 23 Years Ago...

(69%) Roller-Coaster
Tales of roller-coaster accidents are the stuff of nightmares. It turns out that such tragedies are less common than folklore would have us believe. In The Science of Roller Coasters, Ted Oehmke reveals that there have been only 42 such deaths in the last 11 years. It

'Military Intelligence' History: 23 Years Ago...

(69%) Intelligence Blunders
A deadly explosion in the Philippines was linked to careless NBI agents smoking near a bucketful of dynamite powder. Remnants of hand grenades, bullets, and weapons were scattered far and wide...

'King Louis III' Love History: 1140 Years Ago...

(69%) Lovestruck Louis III
Blindly following lust, the world came crashing down upon the head of King Louis III, overzealous ruler of Francia. Despite great military success, great loss followed on its heels when a comely lady caught his eye...

Astronomy History Lesson: 23 Years Ago...

(66%) Lights Out
On Friday the 13th, Scott and his sister Kimberly had an electrifying experience while attempting to view the annual Perseid meteor shower. Scott, an aspiring young astronomer, set up his telescope for a closer view of the sky. Alas, poor Scott did not reflect on the

Electric Resistance Lesson: 23 Years Ago...

(63%) Resistance is Futile
A US Navy safety publication describes injuries incurred while doing don't's. One page described the fate of a sailor playing with a multimeter in an unauthorized manner. He was curious about the resistance level

Jet Ski History Lesson: 23 Years Ago...

(61%) Wet Will He
This story sounds like an urban legend, but it's true. Rodney was jet skiing around Lake Washington, enjoying the sun and the power between his knees. But he noticed that his battery was beginning to fail. He idled over to a dock near Juanita Beach Park

Eclipse History Lesson: 23 Years Ago...

(60%) Mental Eclipse
A 42-year-old man killed himself watching the eclipse while driving near Kaiserslautern, Germany. A witness driving behind him stated that the man was weaving back and forth as he concentrated on...

Rock Throwing Lesson: 20 Years Ago...

(57%) A Rocky Roll
An innovative petty crime spree turned into a Darwinian opportunity when a Vancouver man fell out of a minivan while throwing rocks. Five men had been denting mailboxes and moving cars with their low-tech missiles, when 2

Diving History Lesson: 23 Years Ago...

(49%) Show Off
A 27-year-old man, bent on impressing three boys, dove into the ocean from an 80-foot cliff. He was knocked unconscious by the impact with the water and rocks below. One boy climbed down the cliff and dragged the man from the sea, while his friends called for help.

Car Tire Lesson: 22 Years Ago...

(49%) Tired of it All
Daniel was tired to death - literally -- at the Buckeye Ford Dealership in London. He had sneaked onto the lot in the wee hours of the morning with theft on his mind. His modus operandi was to jack up t

Sauna History Lesson: 23 Years Ago...

(45%) Sauna Kills Monk
An elderly Buddhist monk and three of his followers died after spending hours in a homemade herbal sauna. Five others remain hospitalized in serious condition. The poorly constructed sauna had been set up in a basement room in the Bungrasi Buddhist temple near Bangkok. The group

Gym Electricity Lesson: 22 Years Ago...

(28%) Power Punch Proves Fatal
Ian was a fitness fanatic and self-employed electrician living in an English seaside town. He had recently converted one room of his cottage into a new gym. Among the weights and exercise equipment hung a...

Wheelchair Safety Lesson: 12 Years Ago...

(25 August 2010) Angry Wheelchair Man
As the video shows, an agrry man is rolling toward an elevator as the doors close and the lift departs. Annoyed, he reviews his options and choosed to back up, ram his wheeled chair into the reinforced shaft doors, and repeat THREE TIMES until literally breaking through. Plunging down an empty elevator shaft is a weird way to die, but his perseverence paid off;with a Darwin Award.