Margaret confided in her pastor that she was thinking of divorcing her husband. He asked why this was so- “Has he been involved in adultery?” “Adultery! Father, the man’s as childish as it gets!”
“Well, does he go in for unnatural connubial practices?” “He’s been known to play the fiddle a bit, Father, but I’ve never heard him practising on any connubial.”
“Do the two of you have a grudge?” “Grudge? No, we have a car port.”
“What is it then, that you want to divorce him?” “Father, one just cannot have an intelligent conversation with the man!”
I haven’t posted in some time and decided it was time to do so. The recent episodes involving ICE raids have got me riled up again, so if you’re a protester, lean left, believe what people tell you, or protest for a living; this post isn’t for you.
I feel sorry for the family of the woman who was shot by agents in Minneapolis. Sometimes playing stupid games can be fatal. I’ll say it again, follow the money. If these two, and others, were paid to protest find out who’s paying them. Take this out by going to source first.
Some are saying they have to right to protest. That is true, but it doesn’t mean you can threaten law enforcement and block streets or highways. If you do not want to be shot or arrested, learn the laws concerning what you are doing. I believe the recent actions go far beyond the right to peacefully assemble.
Our country has been dumbed down enough, and we need to turn that around also. First things to addressed should be schools and the media. Allow only American flags in classrooms and just go back to teaching the kids how to read and write before they graduate. The media has to go to responsible coverage of the news and leave the gossip to the View.
Finally, stop spewing hatred. You don’t have the right to kill people who disagree with you or that you disagree with. You seem to forget that right wing and the left wing are part of the same bird. And now, I’m done. Enjoy our Wednesday.
The very well-heeled Mr Smythe was one to visit many a church, leaving a donation at each. One day, he stopped at his very posh parish, and noticed a solid gold telephone was on the desk. When he asked what it was, he was told that it was a direct wire to heaven. Smyth, fascinated, asked if he could use the telephone – and was told that, indeed he could, but this would require a donation of fifty thousand. So, he did so.
A week later, Smythe made his annual call on a very poor parish, and noticed another of the gold telephones there. He inquired if this was another line to heaven, and was told indeed it was. Again, he asked if he could use it, and was told that he was welcome to do so, but could he please leave a donation of 50p.
“50p? When I used the same telephone at another church, it cost me 50 thousand!”
“Yes, sir, we know – but, from here, it is a local number.”
Paddy and Brigid had been going together for thirty years, and decided it was time to marry. When Paddy saw Father O’Farrell to make the arrangements for the wedding, he confided that the liturgical changes in the Church had him puzzled, and asked what the best options were for the ceremony.
“Well, you can have the old rite if you want it, Pat,” Father replied, “but it’s so cold and formal! Now, with the new rite, there is warmth, and love and real participation! So, in your place, I’d take the new one.” Ever obedient to the clergy, Paddy agreed.
On the day of the wedding, Paddy was driving to the church alone when one of the tyres on his car went flat! He removed his jacket, shirt, and tie, rolled his trouser legs to the knees, and fixed the tyre. By then, he was quite late (and fearful Brigid would think he wasn’t going to show after thirty years!), so he put his clothing to rights quickly. Though all else was fine, Paddy did not realise that his trouser legs were still rolled.
Paddy rushed into the church, quite breathless, and Father O’Farrell, seeing the state of his attire, called out to him, “Paddy! Pull down your trousers, now.”
Indignant, Paddy replied, “Father, I’ll take the old rite!”
A Jewish rabbi and a Catholic priest were good friends. At a picnic one day, the priest was eating a ham sandwich. “You know,” he said to his friend, “this ham sandwich is delicious. I know you’re not supposed to eat ham, but I don’t understand why such a good thing would be forbidden. When will you break down and try it?”
A young boy and his doting grandmother were walking along the sea shore when a huge wave appeared out of nowhere, sweeping the child out to sea.
The horrified woman fell to her knees, raised her eyes to the heavens and begged the Lord to return her beloved grandson. And, lo, another wave reared up and deposited the stunned child on the sand before her.
The grandmother looked the boy over carefully. He was fine. But still she stared up angrily toward the heavens. “When we came,” she snapped indignantly, “he had a hat!”
Last Saturday the early forecasts said we’d be getting a couple inches of white fluffy love from above. Later forecasts got serious and the snow totals went up to 14 inches with high winds and drifting snow. When the white stuff stopped falling, we had 10.6 inches of snow and snow drifts that were impressive. The wind was also something to watch as it blew the snow places snow shouldn’t be.
Since then, we got another flurry that could have added another 4 inches to the total snowfall but turned into a dud. This oldfart has been out shoveling since it stopped, and I’m proud to say that I got the car uncovered. It took 3 days to get that much done and I’ve decided this oldfart is going to hire someone to clear the snow from now on.
I finally got the got out today after a neighbor shoveled a path for the car. Thank you. First thing I did after being house bound for 3 days is cruise to McDonald’s and get some Quarter Pounders with Cheese. I know, that’s the definition of junk food, but I’m 74 and aren’t going to live forever. Hope you had better weather than us and all is well. Enjoy our Wednesday.
Posted by cruisin2 
Just Cruisin 2 