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Comments for Change in Progress!
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com
We must not cease from exploration and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we began and to know the place for the first time. ~T.S. EliotWed, 04 Jan 2012 21:23:41 +0000
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Comment on Mid-Life Crisis…or Did I Finally Get a Clue? by tvexplorer
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/04/17/mid-life-crisisor-did-i-finally-get-a-clue/#comment-28
Tue, 21 Apr 2009 12:47:12 +0000https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/?p=153#comment-28This is very uplifting. Glad things are going well for you. If it makes you feel better, my triglycerides are on the high-side too. And I diet and work out like a demon!
Lord help us all. :-)
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Comment on Mid-Life Crisis…or Did I Finally Get a Clue? by misfitmistress
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/04/17/mid-life-crisisor-did-i-finally-get-a-clue/#comment-27
Sat, 18 Apr 2009 02:53:21 +0000https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/?p=153#comment-27great post! so glad you are upbeat lately. i LOVE my wii and wii fit- tons of fun indeed! you speak something very true about life- you almost have to live each day as if you had a terminal illness… to be honest, thats why i think sometimes it was easy to justify my affair- that it was something that made me tick, made me live… made me experience something that felt great… youll be glad to know that i understand there are other outlets now.
also, have you ever read “a gift from the sea?” by anne morrow lindbergh? i think you might enjoy it considering your current mind state- its a great, quick, read. continue laughing and enjoying each day!
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Comment on Some Stuff About Me by onelife4now
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/about/#comment-26
Sat, 28 Mar 2009 23:01:33 +0000#comment-26Hi Terri,
Read your last blog “rose-colored glasses”. It reminded me of something I did years ago when my first marriage was ending. I became close, too close, to my boss. We talked a lot because he was unhappy in his marriage and I was unhappy in mine. I was talking divorce and he was constantly flirting with me, making me feel good about myself. My ego got the better of me and I briefly allowed the flirtation to flourish. His wife got wind of it and fired me. He never took responsibility for his part and blamed it all on me. This whole episode lasted only a few weeks but was horrible. I felt guilty for many years. I wrote her a letter to apologize but later found out that he intercepted the letter and she never got it. Thankfully, God has forgiven me and they are still together but it is a part of my life that I am not proud of. His wife was the smart one to see the world clearly and not under-estimate the power of mutual attraction. Take off the glasses because that’s the real world. P.S I have a great before and after picture on my last blog.(before and after weight pictures that is!) Too bad I couldn’t give you before and after pictures of my heart!
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Comment on Long Lost Friends and Rose-Colored Glasses by tvexplorer
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/23/long-lost-friends-and-rose-colored-glasses/#comment-25
Thu, 26 Mar 2009 12:11:07 +0000https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/?p=148#comment-25Oh, and I meant to say, I, too, am a year away from this college stuff. I fear it with every last penny in my pocket! Good luck on that, T!
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Comment on Long Lost Friends and Rose-Colored Glasses by tvexplorer
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/23/long-lost-friends-and-rose-colored-glasses/#comment-24
Wed, 25 Mar 2009 12:25:16 +0000https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/?p=148#comment-24Like you, I fear that your friend (the first one mentioned) is deluding herself that has husband hasn’t slept with his OW. If it hasn’t happened, it will happen. We both know that. Let’s just hope her husband isn’t “love drunk” on this other woman, the way I was. THAT’S when wives need to worry.
By the way, I’ve wanted to say this to you: Your husband is soooo fortunate you are taking him back. Giving him a chance. You sound like a person who sees the affair for what it is, or what it was. Nothing more. Nothing less. Just a big bad mistake. My wife acts like I’m the only guy in the world who’s ever done this. She is unable to process what happened, and start the process of healing and forgiving. Sucks for me.
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Comment on Long Lost Friends and Rose-Colored Glasses by misfitmistress
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/23/long-lost-friends-and-rose-colored-glasses/#comment-23
Wed, 25 Mar 2009 01:49:52 +0000https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/?p=148#comment-23oh no! not college… i keep warning my students who are juniors to start thinking about how to financially provide for college. i think most of them are lost. i know you mentioned your daughter will move out- is she leaving town, too?
you are very kind to help your friend… not that they seem to be, but dont let her current conflict stir up the issues youve already dealt with! and you are so right… you and i may be experts in affairs, but they are all so different. mainly because they are so complicated by details. however, if i could give advice to your friend- he WAS physically unfaithful… as you know, it drives me nuts that R has sold yet another affair to her as purely emotional. Also, as we both know, someone could talk marriage, leaving their wife, etc… but that doesnt seem to happen as often as you think. so i think your friend may have a chance… but you can always reassure her that if he does leave her- he will probably ditch the other woman, too, at some point.
how sad about your friend with the meth problem! i hope it all goes well and you have a nice time with her. one thing that not having R in my life has provided me is a chance to catch up with people that i didnt make time for because i was constantly arranging my schedule based on him… and reconnecting with those friends have been great… so i hope the same for you!
ps- im so jealous that you are able to get the garden ready… its still cold and there is always the chance of snow still where i am. but im itching to get outside!
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Comment on If we cannot laugh at ourselves, all hope is lost! by misfitmistress
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/13/139/#comment-22
Sun, 15 Mar 2009 17:40:40 +0000https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/13/139/#comment-22i just want to state that i have never really even thought of giving his wife a hard time at all… and any anger i have is always directed at him. i think part of my fear of seeing her would just be how much id want to tell her what a liar she is with because i know so much more than she does. but as ive said before, its not really my place- this is the 2nd time she is going through this with him… if she wants to stay blind, im not going to change that.
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Comment on If we cannot laugh at ourselves, all hope is lost! by ChangeinProgress
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/13/139/#comment-21
Sun, 15 Mar 2009 05:27:17 +0000https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/13/139/#comment-21MM – I hope you DO have the attitude displayed at the end of that song…no one deserves half-assed love. No one. I think there’s plenty of heartache and emotion on every side of this equation…after posting that video (and listening to the better version of the song multiple times, I jumped around youtube watching other similar videos…talk about a trigger…oh boy! Loved the Pink video…Oh heck…I just love me some Pink lol! If I can offer a bit of advice? If you ever run into R or his wife…only dish your anger out on his head. She didn’t do anything…except believe a liar. He’s the three-strike (or more) serial loser. He would deserve whatever you choose to share with him :)
T – this video is hard to watch for all of us, I think…brings up some pretty raw emotions. The ending…well, I’d be lying if I didn’t wish that the ow in my case would step in front of a bus…or want to push her face through a brick wall…but yeah…nonviolence, that’s the ticket. God kept saying ‘forgive’, and I kept saying ‘no, no, no, no’…and then I finally said ‘yes, Lord’. THE absolute hardest thing I have ever done in my life…and I still have to do it every day. Somedays, it goes better that others :)
I had two good friends that really wanted to go kick her butt…but I new that would not get me what I wanted…which was for my husband to see that he was walking away from a good woman who loved him, and exactly what he was walking away for.
My teenage daughter was scared to death the ow was going to be a ‘fatal attraction’ type…she’d freak out if I left the door unlocked, etc… I was astounded that she thought the ow would come to hurt us…physically. Maybe it was because she inflicted as much mental and emotional pain as she possibly could…blah…enough of THAT. Trigger time :(
(not helped by the fact that I was cleaning out old email…and found emails from ow and husband during that time and started reading them…had to stop after a couple…and STILL…I didn’t delete them.)
Okay guys…let’s say it together…nonviolence good…revenge bad…forgiveness good…bitterness bad. Okay…that’s the extent of my mental agility after a visit to the in-laws today…ha!
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Comment on If we cannot laugh at ourselves, all hope is lost! by tvexplorer
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/13/139/#comment-20
Sat, 14 Mar 2009 12:30:59 +0000https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/13/139/#comment-20Nice video. A bit hard to watch from my standpoint, as you might imagine. I will say this: It’s by the grace of God my wife didn’t drive to OW’s house and beat her ass after our affair was exposed. I didn’t know this early on, but found out later there were plans in the works by my wife for some serious butt kickin.’ OW doesn’t know how close she came to getting her head bashed in by my wife and our two teen daughters. They probably would’ve killed her had they gone through with it.
That said, I don’t condone violence either. And I’ll bet my a** OW doesn’t condone it either. :-)
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Comment on If we cannot laugh at ourselves, all hope is lost! by misfitmistress
https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/13/139/#comment-19
Sat, 14 Mar 2009 05:02:47 +0000https://canthingsbechanged.wordpress.com/2009/03/13/139/#comment-19hey t! no offense taken… and you are right, we have to laugh. and i think we might all be guilty of revenge fantasies… i still have them. i just dont act on them- nor will i! although i often wonder what will happen if i cross R or his wife or both of them in public- i often believe our close proximity will one day lead to a run in… and as you have read he has already “kept” her away from my gym! i wonder how long that will last… i would never be physical- im just worried what might come out of my opinionated mouth!
i thought id share two videos with you… one that i think explains how i felt all too well… i love the end and would listen to this song and tell myself one day i would have the strength to have that attitude…
and one that brought me a lot of strength, fun, and laughter…
